Clocked In, Punched Out

Face to Face.

I love discovering a band that I know I’m going to enjoy a lot for months, or maybe even years to come.

Everyone sucks.

Lol.

Last night was Colby’s birthday party. I have never seen anyone completely wasted by 9pm.

My Own Demons Drag Me Down Everyday.

Part of me misses being in a band. It was kinda fun, but the annoyances and hassles outweighed the fun.

I was listening to Naysayer and I really like their lyrics.

“i’m at the end of my rope and i’m slipping
losing my faith in humanity - i’m falling fast
i’ve lost my grasp on reality

daily struggle is weighing me down
society tries to pull me underground
another year has passed - everything’s the same
nothing’s gotten better - am i to blame?

my own demons drag me down everyday
in this world of death, deceit, and decay
fucked in the head - don’t stand a chance
this wretched world has me fucking trapped”

Gloomy I know, but that’s pretty much how I feel.

When I was writing lyrics for Brace Yourself / Scumbag / whatever we decided to call our band at the moment, they were too simple. I wanted some deep personal shit but nothing really ever came to mind that fit with our music. Then again I was like 16 / 17 at the time, just getting into this scene of music. Since then I’ve matured and developed as both a person, a writer, and just a music enthusiast.

I’ve been in the mood to write so much lately. Whether it be a narrative, blogging, lyrics, whatever. Anything. Expect to see some on here, maybe soon.

Miserable.

I got drunk by myself last night… again. To the point of throwing up. A toast to the holiday season? Fuck Christmas time.

I’m seriously just gonna quit drinking (that’s a lie). I say that all the time but sure enough I just end up doing it again. What is the point? I get really obnoxious and then feel like a bag of dicks the next day. I don’t understand myself sometimes.

“What’s the first thing I do when I wake up in the morning? Wish I hadn’t.”

Hi~

Technology is fucking with my mind. Well not right now, but it occurred to me the other night that while you’re not physically with anyone, people still expect you to have some sort of interaction with them whether it’s online or through a phone. As if that’s all it takes to form or strengthen or maintain a bond with someone.

It’s also mind boggling that I’m able to characterize the different personalities of people I’ve never met, just from reading a bunch of words on a screen. That’s it. I’m sure I could meet some people in real life and it would be as though we’ve met before based on how you carry yourself through a bunch of words on a screen. Or maybe I just over-analyze everything and that’s just creepy.



I’m a guy that likes to be left alone a lot. I’m not much of a people person. Don’t get me wrong though, I like going out. Just not every damn day.

So when you’re alone and someone calls you 5 times, they automatically assume you’re mad at them when you don’t answer. Maybe I just don’t want to fucking talk. The same rules apply to texting. God forbid you don’t text someone back within 5 minutes, you apparently “hate them”.

We’re at a period of time where being friends with someone on a social networking site is all it takes to be considered a friend. You might only hang out with them once every blue moon but you’re still friends due to the internet.



At the same time though, technology is too convenient. It’s like a love / hate relationship.